Relationships

3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Dating a Non-Christian

By Jarrid Wilson

1. What are my motives?

Missionary dating is something many of us have heard of, but how many of us have actually taken part in it? You’d be surprised to know how many Christians date someone with opposing religious views, all in hopes of converting them in the near future.

I understand that God can use all things to work together for the good of those who are in Christ, but I cannot help but wonder if God would encourage a relationship that is unequally yoked. I don’t see him doing so. I’m not ignorant enough to think that God hasn’t used an unequally yoked couple for His good, but I will still fall on the side of discouraging relationships where both parties aren’t on the same spiritual page. Seek Him first. (Proverbs 16)

2. Will this hinder my relationship with God?

Your relationship with God should always be put above your relationship with anyone else, and that includes your future spouse. My wife and I both encourage one another to make God our first priority, and in doing so, our relationship with each other will flourish. Anyone who doesn’t encourage you to seek a deeper relationship with God isn’t someone worth giving your time to. This might sound harsh, but I promise you it’s a standard worth implementing. (Proverbs 3:6)

“Without spiritual unity, there can be no ultimate sexual unity. By “ultimate,” I mean the type of sexual unity God designed a husband and wife to enjoy with one another.” —Andy Murray

3. What does The Bible say?

The Bible is pretty clear when it comes to this topic. And while many people might disagree, let me share a few verses to help shed some light. This isn’t to say that unbelievers can’t be good people, but I am saying I’d discourage you from dating someone who isn’t on the same spiritual foundation as you. It’s going to mess you up, confuse your heart and potentially smother your soul.

Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? —Corinthians 6:14

The most important relationship to a Christian should be their relationship with Jesus Christ. Any Bible-believing Christian will tell you that. Every other relationship is secondary, and not to be put before our Lord, God. If a Christian decides to marry an unbeliever, one has to ask whether or not he or she is choosing to ignore what God says about being unequally yoked.

About the Author: Jarrid Wilson is a husband to Juli, Dad to Finch, Pastor, Author, Blogger, Founder of Cause Roast. Helping people live a better story. Check out more from Jarrid on his blog.

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