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What My Husband Doesn’t Know About My Anxiety: “I’m Planning My Own Funeral in My Mind”

By Michelle Lindsey

Dear Husbands,

If your wife struggles with anxiety, I know you feel helpless at times. It’s very difficult to understand. I know a thing or two about anxiety and let me tell you, it’s terrible. It’s as if your very core is broken. When the panic button is flipped, reason goes right out the window.

Imagine a pack of wolves are breathing down your neck and are ready to rip you to shreds at any moment. They’re nipping at your heels and their breath is hot on your back. Now, instead of running away from them, go balance your checking account or tuck your toddler into bed. Just ignore their fangs as you go grab some groceries.

This is what it feels like to a person with anxiety.

You can’t focus on everyday tasks because your mind is too busy trying to stay safe. Nobody can see those wolves but they feel real to the person with anxiety.

To make matters worse, anxiety writes a bad ending to every story. Nobody lives happily ever after, and everyone ends up surrounded by death and destruction. Anxiety and Fear are sisters and their mother is Doubt. This leaves you alone and afraid with no chance for help.

There is no silver lining and all hope is lost when anxiety grabs hold. Your wife is most likely planning her own funeral in her mind while she’s blow drying her hair. Her mind is battling between what she knows to be true, including God’s promises, and what she is feeling, which is terror. And then she hears, “Just snap out of it, you’re fine!” it doesn’t help one bit.

Michelle Lindsey
Michelle Lindsey
Michelle Lindsey is a Jesus-loving wife of more than two decades and a homeschooling mom of four who blogs about what happens when romance meets reality (with her adult daughter!) at Nitty Gritty Love. You can find more Nitty Gritty Love on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram.

WATCH: Sisters Sing Bone-Chilling Easter Rendition of Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’

The young sisters from Fort Frances, Ontario sing an Easter rendition of Leonard Cohen's famous "Hallelujah," that is so beautiful, it'll bring tears to your eyes.

What Is Maundy Thursday?—How to Celebrate During Holy Week

As we celebrate Holy Week, the week leading up to Easter, you may start to wonder, what is Maundy Thursday? Three days before Easter, we come to Maundy Thursday. "Maundy" comes from the Latin word "mandatum," meaning command, order, or commission.

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They’re the most famous conjoined twins in the world, and now Abby Hensel, of the duo Abby and Brittany, is now married!