Humor

Mom Asks the Internet How to Open Cabinet After Earthquake—& The Responses Are Downright Hysterical

The Internet is the perfect place to get advice. It’s the worst place to get accurate or coherent advice, i.e., WebMD, but it’s entertaining. This brings us to the perfect example of that reality. A stay-at-home mother just posted a picture of a dilemma she’s having with her china cabinet with the caption, ‘A cupboard that can never be opened.’

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Apparently there was an earthquake that moved the porcelain dishes against the window of the cupboard, making it impossible to open without destroying all of the dishes. The Internet did its part and responded with over 16,000 reactions and 500 comments, ranging from hilarious to useful. Here are some of our favorites. Be sure to comment below with any ideas you might have for this mom!

Build an identical house next to your existing house with only one difference, the plates would be on the shelf. Then delete the old house.

Open a bottle of wine > Have a drink > Wait for a husband to come home. Start a random argument out of nothing > Go to the kitchen . open the door and let it smash > blame it on the husband – he’ll apologize and buy a whole new set of plates.

Flood the house, then open the cupboard without any risk!

try switching it off then switching it back on again

Just let yourself die and respawn back to your last check point when the plates were nicely stacked

Go to Kamar-Taj, see The Ancient One, be a sorcerer, find The Eye of Agamotto, reverse or stop time, arrange back, and you’re done!

Sell it to the museum and name it the “Frozen in Time” series.

Name it schrodinger’s cupboard because at this time the bowls are both intact and broken

Take a picture of it and ask people on internet

Try ctrl + Z… this will work

Tape the cupboard with scallop tape, then leave it for your grandchildren to deal with; or save it as a future dowry for your daughter.

The theoreticist solution: define the plates to be unbreakable. Open the door safely.

The Jigsaw puzzle champion solution: buy much glue suitable for ceramics. Open the door quickly. Have fun for hours!

Spend a few months in the secret mountain tops of Japan and train. You must become a ninja with lightning reflexes. With your newly found ninja skills catching those plates when you open the cupboard will be easy.

Fly with the cupboard into the outer space. Open it safely. Then go back.

Go to the Cupboard Menue and click Restore

Once an engineer told me a roll of duct tape would fix any problem

The political solution: declare it to be a problem of the next generation. Tell your children that this is how life is. (Rant at them still if they open the door and remind them of their “generational responsibility”.)

Get a big plastic bowl, stuff it with towels.. Have someone hold the bowl very close to the door, open gently and let it all the plates drop in there.. Even if any breaks, it will save you the stress of cleaning up.

Sell the house

I think the internet now is more interested in seeing the door actually being open. Be sure to video it and post it on line again, thanks!

Spin the house round n round n round until the centrifugal force pushes the plates back onto the shelf. Be careful to stop the spin slowly.

Lairs Johnston
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Lairs is the chief of sinners, saved by grace, with a life that just goes to show you God can use anyone. His passions are fighting sex trafficking, talking about depression, and helping high school students have a voice. He may only be 28 and a half but he can read at a 30 year old level.

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