By Craig Greenfield
My neighbors were evicted.
I came home to find their worldly belongings – a couple of dirty sheets, a filthy pink pillow and assorted clothing – piled in a puddle outside my front door.
They had previously been living crammed together in one of the tiny, windowless rooms that line our alleyway.
Apparently our landlord (the same tough old lady owns a bunch of the housing around here) decided that their drunken arguments were too much to put up with. So mother, father, and four kids ranging from ages 1 to 12 were thrown out on the street. They were gone before I even realized it.
A bleak existence just became bleaker.
But here’s the dilemma. There’s no doubt that the mother’s relentless drinking and fighting contributed to the situation they now find themselves in. She was hard to like and even harder to help. She neglected her kids in order to sit drinking and playing cards with the neighbors. She would scream at her daughters when they forgot to cook the rice or wash the clothes, while she sat around doing nothing.
So, why should I help her?
Have you ever noticed that there’s something in our human nature that seeks to divide people on the margins into the “deserving poor” and the “undeserving poor”? On the one hand, a trash-talking alcoholic who neglects her kids in order to play cards all day is easily deemed “undeserving,” while the four innocent children affected by her behavior are clearly “deserving.”
I bet I could raise a ton of money to help those kids. But I’d be hard-pressed to get folks to open their wallets to help that woman.
What I want to suggest to you today is that asking whether people are “deserving” or “undeserving” is the WRONG question. And when you ask the wrong question, you’ll get the wrong answer – every single time.
Interestingly, Jesus dealt with this problem. In those days, disability and poverty were viewed as the result of sin. Much of the world today believes this way. It’s called Karma – the idea that your sins in previous lives directly impact this life. But Jesus rejected that analysis.
When the disciples came across a blind man, they wanted Jesus to tell them whose sin caused his predicament. They wanted Jesus to allocate blame. Instead Jesus chose to pivot to the more important truth:
As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.” (John 9:1-3)
Jesus is making it clear that God’s work in transforming lives is more about God’s love than whether the beneficiaries are deserving or not. For no one is worthy. That’s why we need God’s grace.
In Matthew 25, Jesus does not categorize people based on whether they had sinned…or not. Nor did He judge them by whether they had already had multiple chances…or not. His call was simply to reach out to those whose needs are unmet and love them: “I was hungry. I was thirsty. I was unclothed. I was in prison. I was sick.”
So, here are three principles to keep in mind as you engage with those who might be viewed as “undeserving” in your own life and ministry:
1. Extend the same grace you have for yourself, to others
The words of Jesus, “Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you” are beautifully applicable in this situation. After all, we ALL have sinned and fallen short of God’s standards for our lives. If we measured how much each of us deserve grace, forgiveness and love, you and I would BOTH fall short.
By a mile.
When I talk about extending grace, some assume that I am saying we should ignore sin. They wonder if I am advocating that we “enable” people in their destructive behaviors.
Please hear me clearly on this: I am not advocating enabling anyone. I am passionate about transformation.
But I recognize: “There, but by the grace of God go I.”
I don’t know what demons my neighbor is seeking to escape. I don’t know what trauma or abuse she has suffered at the hands of others. I don’t know how her mother raised her (or more likely didn’t, since much of her childhood would have been during the Khmer Rouge years). I don’t know her enough to judge her. Only God does. So my role is simply to love and serve, and pray for change.
2. Seek to understand, rather than to judge
I find it SO tempting to judge. We’re quick to label those we view as undeserving, using terms like “Welfare Queens,” “dole-bludgers” and “layabouts.” And in doing so we judge them unworthy of our love and effort.