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3 Ways to Fight for Your Marriage When You’re Tempted to Throw in the Towel

"People were placing bets at our wedding. Nobody thought we had a chance."

How to Deal With a Lying Husband and Get a Better Marriage

"I can still remember vividly the look on my husband’s face as regretful tears fell and he lay broken before me."

One Year After “I Do,” Husband Realizes Why Marriage Isn’t for Him

They met when they were 15 and were best friends for 10 years—but after being married just 1 year, the truth hit him HARD.

Dear Christians, Stop Giving Thanks For Everything

To give thanks FOR all circumstances is to say that the situation itself (rather than what might arise from it) is good. We risk calling good what is evil.

And when we do this, we skew the vision of God’s creation and recreation. We present (to ourselves or to others) the idea that the world as it is, with all of its bruises and scars and brambles and deep pain, is what God intended for us. We turn God into a cruel or distant being who wants us to say thank you for injustice, inhumane suffering, and evil.

These things that are so far from the vision of shalom in scripture shouldn’t be celebrated. They should be named for what they are.

The Psalms, the prayer book of the Israelites, is not comprised only of prayers of thanksgiving, but also prayers of lament. They give us space to complain when things don’t line up with the goodness of what God creates.

By all means, look for things to give thanks for in the hardest seasons, in the biggest instances of injustice and evil. Look for ways that God might be working, that God might be meeting you in the midst of the pain. Cling to the hope and the promises and the new creation as if your life depends on it.

But also give yourself permission to lament, to fight against evil, to kick against darkness, to speak truth, to enact shalom.

Julianne Gilchrist
Julianne Gilchrist
Julianne Gilchrist is a spiritual director, retreat facilitator, and mom to three. She loves creating space for others to slow down and (re)connect with God. She and her husband run a small business designed to help those in ministry rest, reflect, and grow. She spends her free time exploring the outdoors with her family, trying not to fall off her paddleboard, or taking her dog for long walks by the river. You can find her on Instagram at gilchrist_coaching or online at gilchristcoaching.com.

3 Ways to Fight for Your Marriage When You’re Tempted to Throw in the Towel

"People were placing bets at our wedding. Nobody thought we had a chance."

How to Deal With a Lying Husband and Get a Better Marriage

"I can still remember vividly the look on my husband’s face as regretful tears fell and he lay broken before me."

One Year After “I Do,” Husband Realizes Why Marriage Isn’t for Him

They met when they were 15 and were best friends for 10 years—but after being married just 1 year, the truth hit him HARD.