Divorce can be deadly. It puts immense strain on relationships, causes financial and emotional ruin, and worst of all, tears apart the kids. It’s not just the ending of a marriage. It’s the destruction of a family. A broken promise… A “forever” that turned out to be a lie. As a child of divorce myself, I know the wound runs deep, and it can take decades to heal. From restraining orders to endless court battles, the fight can get downright nasty.
But one man, Sean Whalen, decided that he wanted to do things a little differently.
Facebook/Sean Whalen
Breaking the Cycle of Bitterness
When he and his ex initially separated, Sean admittedly wanted nothing more than to punch the living daylights out of her boyfriend — and they both required police escorts for their visitations with the kids.
The bitterness ran so deep that they couldn’t even utter a word to one another. Lawyers had to do the talking.
But on this day, they broke bread.
Facebook/Sean Whalen
Sean shared a heartwarming Facebook post detailing their story in brief but powerful snippets that have quickly gained viral attention, amassing over 600,000 likes and shares since it was originally written.
It is woven together simply yet seamlessly with a message of bold love, reconciliation and the healing power of “choice”:
This is my ex wife and her husband.
Our 3 kids and their 2 kids.
Tonight they invited me over for dinner.
[Five] years ago she and I had to have a police escort just to pick up and drop off our kids.
We only communicated through lawyers.
I wanted to punch her boyfriend (now her husband).
Tonight we broke bread, laughed, played with the kids and had a great evening.
Never give up friends.
PEACE is a choice.
It’s YOUR choice.
Not THEIR choice.
“Yea but he does…”
“Yea but she does…”What your ex does is IRRELEVANT.
YOU CHOOSE how and what you say.
YOU CHOOSE how and what you do.Even when they are trying to fight with you.
ESPECIALLY when they are trying to fight with you.
CHOOSE to create PEACE by LIVING PEACEFULLY.
Well said, Sean. That’s a life lesson we can all glean some lasting wisdom from.
“Seek peace and pursue it.” ~ Psalm 34:14
Choosing Peace Over Conflict
Sean’s story underscores a vital lesson: the power of choice in the aftermath of divorce. By choosing to engage peacefully and focusing on the well-being of their children, both Sean and his ex-wife could transcend their past conflicts. This approach not only healed old wounds but also fostered a supportive environment for their children to grow.
This narrative serves as a profound reminder that even in situations fraught with anger and hurt, there is a possibility for redemption and harmony. By actively choosing peace and working towards reconciliation, individuals can move beyond the painful chapters of their lives. As Sean poignantly puts it, the actions of your ex are irrelevant in the grand scheme; what truly matters is how you choose to respond and the peaceful life you decide to create for yourself and your loved ones.
As we reflect on Sean’s journey and the biblical wisdom to “seek peace and pursue it” (Psalm 34:14), let us all remember that in the face of adversity, peace is not just a distant hope, but a tangible choice.
