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Mom Shares Innovative Way She Teaches Kids to Use Their Manners

In the hustle and bustle of daily life, parents often find themselves reminding their children to use polite phrases and exhibit good manners. This can sometimes lead to a repetitive and exasperating cycle of commands and corrections that might not yield the desired results. However, one mom has found an innovative and gentle approach to instilling manners in her children, transforming a potentially frustrating task into a positive and effective learning experience.

One mom’s powerful method, which involves the phrase “Are you asking me something?” has proven to be a game-changer in fostering good manners and respectful communication within her family.

The Shift in Approach

A couple of years ago, this mom realized that her usual way of reminding her daughters to use their manners was not as effective as she had hoped. She would often say things like “How do you ask?” or “Where are your manners?” These phrases, while well-intentioned, came across as commands and did not always lead to the desired change in her children’s behavior.

Reflecting on her approach, she decided to try something different. Instead of barking commands or making her children feel reprimanded, she opted for a more gentle and engaging method. She began to ask, “Oh, are you asking me something?” whenever her daughters made demands without using polite language. This simple question prompted her children to rethink their words and rephrase their requests in a more courteous manner.

The Power of a Simple Question

The beauty of the question “Are you asking me something?” lies in its simplicity and effectiveness. By posing this question, the mom gently reminds her children to use their manners without directly chastising them. It creates a moment of reflection for the children, allowing them to self-correct and learn the appropriate way to ask for something.

Whenever her daughters would say things like “I’m thirsty” or “I want this,” she would respond with, “Oh, are you asking me something?” Almost immediately, her children would rephrase their requests to include polite phrases such as “Can I please have a drink of water?” or “Can I please have this?” This method not only reinforces the use of manners but also teaches children to think before they speak and to consider the impact of their words.

Keeping It Lighthearted

A key aspect of this mom’s approach is maintaining a lighthearted and positive attitude. Rather than getting frustrated or upset when her children forget to use their manners, she keeps the tone cheerful and encouraging. This positivity helps create a supportive environment where children feel safe to learn and make mistakes.

For instance, when her daughter demands, “Daddy, why didn’t you bring the cut-up apples?” she might respond with, “Are you asking him for something, love?” This gentle nudge reminds the child to rephrase her question politely, fostering a respectful and cooperative atmosphere within the family.

The Importance of Consistency

One of the crucial elements of this method is consistency. The mom emphasizes the need for parents to be incredibly consistent in reinforcing manners. By consistently asking the same question every time her children make a demand without manners, she reinforces the behavior she wants to see. Over time, this repetition helps ingrain polite behavior as a natural habit for her children.

Patience and Positivity

Patience is another vital component of this approach. Understanding that children are still learning and will sometimes forget to use their manners is essential. Instead of getting upset, the mom remains patient and positive, gently reminding her children each time they forget. This patience helps build a nurturing environment where children can learn and grow at their own pace.

Encouraging Cooperative Communication

Beyond teaching manners, this method also fosters a cooperative and respectful communication style within the family. By modeling polite and respectful behavior, the mom sets a positive example for her children to follow. This approach not only teaches children how to ask for things politely but also how to interact with others in a respectful and considerate manner.

Staff
Staff
FaithIt staff contributed to this article.

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