Parenting

Mom’s Heart Sinks When 3-Yr-Old Blurts Out “I Don’t Have a Dad!”—Then the Truth Hits Her

Our life doesn’t always pan out exactly how we planned. In fact, every time I think I’ve got all my ducks in a row, God seems to decide it’s duck season in heaven and they all get shot out of line.

But that’s kind of a beautiful thing…because when it comes right down to it, we really don’t know what we’re doing anyway.

Control, comfort and order may feel nice, but God’s master plan is often far outside our wildest dreams. Such was the case for Jordan Berry, a single mom whose life wasn’t quite following the sequence of events she had in mind. She was supposed to be engaged by now and living a “perfect” life—but in one embarrassing preschool moment, her 3-year-old daughter gave her the dose of reality that was staring her in the face all along: Her life was already perfect, in all of its messy glory.

Jordan shares her powerful story in the Facebook post below:

“Today when I picked up Brinley from preschool she was standing around a table with her little classmates and teacher playing with play dough. I heard the teacher ask a little girl what her dad’s name was a couple times. That’s when I got nervous to hear what Brinley would say. I listened closely. Brinley blurted out “I don’t have a dad!” My heart sank. She wasn’t sad about it, she said it very matter of fact like. We go over our family tree often in the car because I want her to know our family is different and that it’s okay. I haven’t ever told her “you don’t have a dad” and most of the time she thinks my dad is her dad!

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In that moment I didn’t know if I should address the issue (if there was an issue, I mean technically she has a dad but in her world she doesn’t have one) or if I should let it go. I decided to let it go and just remind her of how happy I am that she is my daughter and that I am so happy God chose her to be mine.

When I reflect on that moment I’m proud of my little girl. Proud that she’s not embarrassed (yes I know she’s only 3) and proud that she loves our unique family. Because sometimes I get embarrassed that I’m a single young mom. But I was also sad for her. Sad because I know the statistics of children without dads and sad that she is missing out.

I think so many times I get caught up in my life plan. I was supposed to be engaged by now and Brinley would be calling that man “dad” and we’d live this perfect life. In that moment she reminded me that it’s okay and that I’m not in control! She reminded me that there’s nothing to be embarrassed about because we have each other. I wouldn’t trade this life for anything. I’m so beyond blessed to have Brinley as my daughter who is constantly teaching me new things about myself and about life.”

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