Sex Before Marriage and Why Christians Might Be Doing More Harm Than Good

In a society that is loaded with sex, sexual tension, lust and yoga pants, it’s no surprise that our understanding of what sex is can be a little tainted. The world tells us that sex is just for fun. It’s playful and desirable and it results in satisfaction.

While Christians often blame culture for distorting people’s views of sex, it turns out there may be something Christians are missing out on as well. Listen to John Mark Comer elaborate on what it really means to make love and elevate our definition of sex above the world’s in the video below.

God tells us that sex is for two people to become one flesh—to be fused together at the deepest level. It’s still fun, and it’s still playful and desirable, but there’s a deeper level that culture fails to see and talk about.

Think about what happens if a couple, we’ll call them Kayla and Jim, are dating, and the two of them are having sex. It’s fun, it’s great, but then they break up. Think about that fuse that God talks about. When Kayla and Jim have sex, they are fusing their bodies and souls together to become one—even if that’s not the way they’re seeing it, it’s how God designed it. Something that’s fused together is not intended to be separated.

You know the old school desks that had a metal surface fused to metal legs? Imagine trying to separate those two metal things from one another. It would never work. You could never have someone tugging the leg, and someone pulling the surface, and actually separate the two. Why? Because they’re fused together.

So when Kayla and Jim break up, they’ve separated something that truly cannot be separated, just like that school desk. Not only that, but their souls that were at one point intertwined, are now suddenly not. This can leave us feeling really confused. But there’s no reason for it.

God didn’t create sex so that we’d have something missing from us. We are not desks with only three legs. God intended for sex to completely fulfill us, to fuse us to another soul, and use our bodies to worship Him.

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