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20 Things My Divorce Taught Me About Marriage

Years ago, a newly divorced Gerald Rogers took to Facebook to reflect on what he wishes he would have known before it was too late. He admits there were a lot of things he could have done differently to save his marriage, and he openly shared the self-effacing letter in the most humble and real way.

“On Labor Day, I Lost My 3-Year-Old Autistic Son at the Worst Place Possible: A Water Park”: Mom Warns Parents It ‘Takes a Village’...

He went down the slide, ran a few feet ahead of me, turned a corner and was gone. It was as quick as that. The only thing in front of him was a lazy river with a strong current. Even if he could swim, he wouldn’t stand a chance.

“I Received a Call. ‘We Have a 14-Year-Old Boy Who Needs a Home.’ I Was Like ‘NO Way'”: Single Mom Becomes Foster Parent to...

"I was a single mom of two boys, doing it 100% on my own. Why in the world would I even consider being a foster parent?"

The Day My 13-Yr-Old Boy Became a Man & Taught Me How to Be a Mom Without Saying a Word

I mean, yeah, I know I am blessed with wonderful kids. I know this.

But in the moments when I feel like their behavior is a reflection of the job I’m doing as mom, I don’t always remember it. 

Our home is their practice field. It is their learning ground. This is where I want them to get it wrong. The failures aren’t forever and they don’t define them—or me.

I live in this place—this close space of motherhood—where it’s easier to pick out what we get wrong and forget to acknowledge the countless things we get right.

I like to think and write, challenge and inspire us to be better because I want to be better and I want to raise grateful kids. But I think it’s also good to stop and acknowledge where we are because that helps us see how far we’ve come.

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I’m always talking about gratitude and perspective (and heck, I wrote a 50,000 word book on it), but I’m learning when it’s hard to see the truth close up (especially on hard days), sometimes we have to step back for it to come into focus. It’s all in how we look at it, but we do have to stop and look.

I called my kids down for dinner. The rocky afternoon was long forgotten as we fought over the biggest squares from the brownie pan.

When I step back and change my perspective, when I turn my magnified view into a bird’s eye one, I don’t see their mistakes.

No, I see really great kids standing in front of me.

And that helps me see that their mom is pretty great, too.

By Kristen Welch
**This post originally appeared on We Are That Family, published with permission.

20 Things My Divorce Taught Me About Marriage

Years ago, a newly divorced Gerald Rogers took to Facebook to reflect on what he wishes he would have known before it was too late. He admits there were a lot of things he could have done differently to save his marriage, and he openly shared the self-effacing letter in the most humble and real way.

“On Labor Day, I Lost My 3-Year-Old Autistic Son at the Worst Place Possible: A Water Park”: Mom Warns Parents It ‘Takes a Village’...

He went down the slide, ran a few feet ahead of me, turned a corner and was gone. It was as quick as that. The only thing in front of him was a lazy river with a strong current. Even if he could swim, he wouldn’t stand a chance.

“I Received a Call. ‘We Have a 14-Year-Old Boy Who Needs a Home.’ I Was Like ‘NO Way'”: Single Mom Becomes Foster Parent to...

"I was a single mom of two boys, doing it 100% on my own. Why in the world would I even consider being a foster parent?"