"Tears-pouring-down-my-face, couldn't-talk-couldn't-breathe kind of laughing. Screaming laughing. So hard that I was sobbing because I couldn't get it together."
A good friend said to me, “But just think, God is using you for His glory." In that moment, I simply shook my head and agreed but what I felt welling up inside me was something much different. Using me? Quite frankly, I thought, I don’t want to be used. Not if it means this. Quite frankly, He can use someone else because this—THIS is not working for me.