What I Want My Kids to Know When I Die

Death is not something I usually spend time pondering. However, recent medical complications have forced me to face the reality that time on this Earth is not guaranteed. My three boys are still young; they are two, three and five. After receiving scary news from doctors, I have given myself permission to think about what I would want my children to know if I wasn’t around to teach them.

What I Want My Kids to Know When I Die

1. You are so deeply loved. Unconditionally.

Human beings lack the ability to show love perfectly, but that does not mean you aren’t loved perfectly. Perfect love is unconditional love. It’s constant and consistent love. It’s a love that doesn’t waver when feelings of anger or disappointment get on the way. Unconditional love is not something you earn based on what you do. It is freely given.

You were created out of unconditional love. The first breath you took was filled with perfect love and that love still lives inside of you. It will never leave you. You may not always feel it, but I promise it’s there. It’s a love that humans can’t define or explain. A love that’s infinitely deeper than our ability to comprehend.

Tap into that love, sweet child. Find where it lives and access it as much as possible. A life fueled by perfect love is a life you don’t want to miss out on. It will be a life that brings about incomprehensible joy and profound peace. Live that life, it was meant for you.

2. People are inherently good.

People are going to fail you. They are going to disappoint you. They are going to make mistakes and they will inevitably hurt you. People are human beings and human beings are flawed. But don’t let their fallible nature jade you. People are innately good, even when they try to prove otherwise.

We are all born into this world pure and innocent. Life experience and circumstance can cause people to act mean. Their actions are often a defense mechanism; it’s how they’ve learned to protect themselves. Hurting people hurt people. Those who are mean to you are deeply hurting and need your compassion. Be kind and trust that they are good. Be the one that restores their faith in humanity. If you look for the good in others, you will always find it. Sometimes you just have to dig a little deeper.

3. What you do does not define who you are.

What you do with your life doesn’t matter. You might grow up to be a world renowned surgeon or you might struggle your whole life to find jobs that will pay the bills. Your job does not matter. But who you are while you’re doing your job matters. Who you are when people are watching and when they aren’t matters. You matter. You are important. You are worthy of love and belonging. You are kind, considerate and selfless.
You were created to matter. Show the world that you matter. Show other people that they matter. Every life matters. Each life should be cherished. Live like you matter. Love like others matter. Because at the end of the day, people won’t remember what you do, they’ll remember who you are.