This morning I looked into the man’s eyes and picked him from a police lineup. There will be a trial in the future, but for now, he is behind bars and will stay there until his judgment day. Later, watching video footage from the bus ride, I watched the man watch me throughout the journey.
He could have killed me. In a puddle of my own blood, he left me in the dark — barely 20 paces from a main road. For all he knew I was dead. But I survived. I’m still here.
The only emotion I’ve been able to come up with throughout this entire week has been relief. Relief that I’m still alive.
Please. To every single woman I know, and to every single man out there who has a mother, a sister, a daughter, a wife, or a friend. Please hug them and make sure they know that this is a very, very real thing.
I never thought something like this could or would ever happen to me. I’ve been traveling on my own for years. In all sorts of countries and countless cities. I’m strong, intelligent, and independent. None of that matters when you’re at the mercy of a man who wants to hurt you.
This is real. This did happen. It does happen. And, unfortunately, it will continue to happen. But please, don’t ever think it can’t happen to you.
I am surrounded by such wonderful, strong, loving people that have already shown me so much support. Their words and love have given me so much strength.
I will not let this break my spirit. This night will not define me. I refuse to let this man strip me of my independence as a woman. But things will change for me. I will never again drink to the point where I let my guard down. But these horrible things happen to women all the time. When they are drunk, when they are sober, on a hike, ‘safely’ in an Uber, even by the hands of a security guard at their hotel. None of us are invincible, and I know that now.
How do we prevent these things from happening? We, as women, can’t. This is up to the men out there, who need to truly understand what it means to respect women. ‘Locker room talk,’ cat-calling, groping a girl on the dance floor. Remember, it’s these actions that could manifest into something bigger.
Women are not objects, we are not here to be taken, used, and discarded. We cannot live our lives in fear, we cannot let evil win. Let this message empower you, not discourage you.
I am so incredibly lucky to be writing this right now. I am overcome with relief and even more with the feeling of a responsibility to share my story. I speak on behalf of anyone who has experienced this hell — and on behalf of those whose voices have been silenced. This story could have ended so differently. Things must change.
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A GoFundMe Page has been started to raise money for sexual assault victims. Please click the link below:
**This story was written by Andrea Sicignano and originally appeared on her Facebook page. Please consider supporting Andrea’s cause and giving a voice to sexual assault victims by donating here.
“From the bottom of my heart I want to thank each and everyone of you for listening to me and supporting me through this time. Your words are so powerful. Together, we can all make a change.“~Andrea Sicignano