One thing that the doctor ordered that I thought was super cool was to date my husband. I was shocked. She actually (out of nowhere) said, “Now that you have four children, you will be engulfed with living for them. I want you at the minimum — twice per month, optimally once a week — to go out with your husband with NO kids. NO baby!” Now she had me listening. I was smiling at these orders for sure. I love dating Bobby!
When I came home, I told Bobby the doctor ordered us to date more. She thinks people with a lot of children must go on dates once a week. He was excited about the idea.
The truth is when you come home with a newborn and you have kids at home, you put you and your spouse on the back burner. Babies need constant attention and your room becomes the baby’s nursery for the first few months. Also, there are more chores with constant night feedings, and the kids get up early — very early. It’s what happens when you have kids.
We compiled a list of dating ideas and are ecstatic about the idea of being alone a few times a month. Here is what we came up with:
- Walking on the beach: I would love to kick-start some exercise, and what better date than to go walking the beach? It would be really nice to talk without being interrupted.
- Paddle boarding: We both love to paddle board and have been doing it for quite some time. We love sports that involve the beach. A day of paddle boarding would be a great date.
- Hiking: We live rather close to many hiking trails and a day of hiking would be wonderful for us. Exploring San Diego is something we love to do.
- Movies: When Bobby was a dental student at NYU, we saw a movie at least once a week. We absolutely love watching movies, and with cinemas taking it to the next level with reclining leather chairs, we are all in.
- Concerts: Bobby and I love music. Seeing a show together would be a great little escape.
- Surf & Ski: I am very lucky to live in San Diego, with the mountains only two hours away. One thing we would love to do is snowboard and surf in the same day. We know people who have done it and we thought it would be fun to do.
- Leave town: We can go to Laguna for the day. It’s only an hour away and checking out the shops without any babes in tow could be fun.
- Galleries: Art is something I just love to immerse myself in. It’s been a long time since I have been able to go to a gallery or two. This would be a fabulous date for us.
- Volunteering: I do believe if we could volunteer at a shelter together, that would be awesome. One Thanksgiving after 9/11 my brother and I baked cookies for every firehouse in the city. We missed Thanksgiving due to the deliveries taking so long.
- Wine & Design: I would love to go painting with Bobby and enjoy some wine. I have done this with friends, but not with my Bobby.
Both my marriage and I deserve a little alone time. Making a habit of connecting with your partner not only on a date but more so on a regular basis, can actually lessen the load and make the journey of being a parent much more enjoyable. Plus our children are being exposed to parents who are affectionate with each other, happy to be together and very much in love from a young age. Hopefully, this will ensure that they have a good foundation and a model to build their own relationships in the future. For more fun parenting tales, head over to my blog, CityGirlGoneMom and join the tribe.
About the Author: CityGirlGoneMom seeks to entertain, educate and inspire those who could use a good laugh, a few parenting tips, and some stellar fashion finds for moms and kids. With four children under the age of [10] in tow, Danielle Lucia Schaffer is a boisterous, blonde Italian ‘mombshell’ hailing from New York City, and tells it like it is. Wife to San Diego’s first green dentist, this Mom makes the juggle and struggle of mommyhood seem effortless. Taking her momager role quite seriously, Danielle guides her tribe through a healthy, active life, capturing some of their greatest moments on and off camera.
