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3 Ways to Fight for Your Marriage When You’re Tempted to Throw in the Towel

"People were placing bets at our wedding. Nobody thought we had a chance."

How to Deal With a Lying Husband and Get a Better Marriage

"I can still remember vividly the look on my husband’s face as regretful tears fell and he lay broken before me."

One Year After “I Do,” Husband Realizes Why Marriage Isn’t for Him

They met when they were 15 and were best friends for 10 years—but after being married just 1 year, the truth hit him HARD.

I Carry Him

I carry him.

I know it looks silly, his toes dangle past my knees. He’s getting tall and heavy, too. It sometimes hurts my back to lift his frame, but, I carry him.

It starts in the morning when waking up is hard. I should make him walk down the stairs, as it’s still something he is working on in physical therapy. But with his sleepy eyes and tired heart, he doesn’t want to start off his day with a task.

So, I carry him.

He works hard to get off the school bus. One hand on the rail and down three large steps with care. He takes my hand and can’t wait to go inside to play. But I make him go to the bathroom first. He doesn’t want to pause. I kneel down, give him a hug, and a reassuring word.

Then, I carry him.

i carry him

At the end of the day, when we’ve worked on manners at the table and holding his utensils with the correct grasp, sometimes he is so done. And there is still the bathing, teeth brushing, and getting dressed to do. From the table and up the stairs we go.

Sometimes, I carry him.

The world moves fast and demands so much from all of us. I imagine with my son’s age and disability, it is often more exhausting. He’s directed and redirected, pushed and pulled throughout the day. There are times when he’s had enough. That’s when I carry his awkwardly long body against my own short one. Because sometimes, we all need someone to carry us to get us through the next hard thing, to love us through our good, bad, and weak moments.

When he’s reached his limit, I’m close to my own. But when I carry him, he somehow carries me, too.

Jillian Benfield
Jillian Benfield
Jillian Benfield is a former TV News Anchor/Reporter, turned military wife and work from home mom. When she was 20 weeks pregnant with her second child, she learned her son had Down syndrome. Now she’s trying to figure out how to juggle a wonderfully sassy toddler and a baby with special needs. She writes at News Anchor To Homemaker.  Jillian’s work has been featured on ABC News, The TODAY Show and Yahoo News. Follow along with her parenting adventures on Facebook!

3 Ways to Fight for Your Marriage When You’re Tempted to Throw in the Towel

"People were placing bets at our wedding. Nobody thought we had a chance."

How to Deal With a Lying Husband and Get a Better Marriage

"I can still remember vividly the look on my husband’s face as regretful tears fell and he lay broken before me."

One Year After “I Do,” Husband Realizes Why Marriage Isn’t for Him

They met when they were 15 and were best friends for 10 years—but after being married just 1 year, the truth hit him HARD.