Dear fellow parent,
I understand.
I understand what it’s like to be in the park and others wonder why you are sticking so close to your child, perhaps guiding them or supporting them to do what other children much younger are doing easily. I know what it’s like to see parents and children stare at your child, laugh at them or worse…walk away from them.
People would understand if your child looked different, if you were pushing them in a wheelchair or if they had a walking frame. I see your child’s disability even when they don’t look disabled.
I understand.
I have a child just like that too.
It’s the expectations, isn’t it? They look fine so why are they not talking like others expect, acting age appropriate or joining in with others? The assumption that ‘looking fine’ means they are ‘fine’ and that we are the issue, not the child. Oh, do I understand that!
Our parenting is questioned just because our child doesn’t ‘look disabled ’ whatever ‘looking disabled’ is even meant to mean? People think we are overprotective, overbearing and causing the problem. Yet they don’t know what we know. They don’t see what we see.
They can’t see autism so they don’t know it’s there.
They can’t see global delay or learning difficulties so they must not exist.
They were not there when you received the genetic diagnosis so they don’t know.
They haven’t experienced the epileptic seizures so therefore you must have made them up.
They don’t know anything about the myriad of specialists you have visited or the volume of appointments your diary is full of.
They see your child and make assumptions based on the fact they look ‘normal.’
I understand.
You dare not mention that your child receives disability money. You know from experience that you will be accused of using your child to get money.