But here’s the thing – yes, all of those experiences absolutely broke me, but they also built me back up in an entirely different way. Yes, they set me back for a short time, but they also set me up for something entirely new. Yes, they changed my wiring, but they also changed the way I operated and the way I learned to live and to love.
All of those nights where I thought God was holding out on me, he was really just holding me in his hand, protecting me from things that were never meant to be. Things that were meant to be a stepping stone and not my final destination, destinations that had been saved for someone else.
That boy who dumped me, he was just good practice, so I would know how to love my husband with everything I have. That business that didn’t pan out, it was just practice so I would know how to pursue my dream job, and so I would have the confidence to keep going even when things got rocky. That friend who broke my heart, she made way for an entire new group of friends, an entire new tribe, who would encourage me and build me and spur me on every single day, and who would teach me the true meaning of sisterhood.
Now, I look at my husband across the kitchen table at dinnertime — my good, good husband. I snuggle with my beautiful babies on the couch every night. I am crazy passionate about the work I’m doing. I laugh so hard tears stream down my face when I’m with my friends.
Life is far from perfect. It’s a mess and it’s chaotic, and it leaves me restless and worried so much of the time. It’s not everything I imagined it would be. We fight. There are bills. There are so many bills. There is sickness. There is pain.
But I can honestly say that I lay my head down every night with a heart overflowing with gratitude into every nook and every cranny and every weak spot thinking, ’God, why? I don’t deserve this.’
I don’t deserve this much love. I don’t deserve this many gifts. I don’t deserve all this much goodness.
So, to every girl who just got dumped by the man of her dreams, to every girl who just had a business fall flat and fail in spectacular fashion, to every girl whose heart is in pieces on the bottom of her closet floor over a friendship that didn’t pan out: hear me. Hear me loud and clear, my sister, my friend because I believe this with all of my heart:
Sometimes hard times don’t harden you. Sometimes, if you will just keep growing through them, they will teach you to be soft and strong. They will make you vulnerable and real.
Sometimes hold-ups don’t hold you down. Sometimes, if you can just believe, they will lift you higher than you ever imagined.
Photo Credit: Amy Weatherly
Sometimes stumbling blocks don’t block you from good things. Sometimes, if you will get back out there and keep climbing, they will be the very blocks that build you into the most beautiful version of yourself.
Sometimes the end of the road isn’t the end of the journey. Sometimes, if you will just keep running forward, you will find they are only the beginning of a brand-new path, the one you were meant to walk down all along.
Sometimes, when you’re crying out alone thinking, ‘God, why? I don’t deserve this.’ He’s gently whispering, ‘No, my child, you don’t. You deserve so much better. Trust me.’”
**This story was written by Amy Weatherly and originally appeared on her Facebook page. See more from Amy Weatherly on her website. Follow Amy’s journey on Instagram here and on Twitter here.
