Years ago, a newly divorced Gerald Rogers took to Facebook to reflect on what he wishes he would have known before it was too late. He admits there were a lot of things he could have done differently to save his marriage, and he openly shared the self-effacing letter in the most humble and real way.
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"I’ve made fun of her, calling her names—so many names. Fat. Ugly. Worthless...I was ashamed of her, ready to move on and live the rest of my life pretending she didn’t exist."
I don’t know what difference I can make today to alleviate the suffering of others, or to shift the American system toward justice and equality. But I think the first steps, as a white man unfamiliar with deep generational suffering, is to apologize and repent.