“Can you do me a huge favor?” My husband’s text inquired.
Before I could finish typing my reply he continued with, “it’s ok if you can’t…”
I watched the texting bubbles continue and finally emerge, “do you mind taking a detour on the way home?”
I easily replied, “of course. I’d do anything for you.”
Then I sent an amusing Meatloaf meme. Meatloaf the band, not the entree.
What I didn’t do was think, “I can’t believe he asked me to do that!” Although I could have. After all, at the time I was currently on my fourth, twelve-hour shift in a row, and he knew this full well. Twelve-hour shifts are no joke anyway, but factor in more like thirteen at the critical care patient bedside, and it felt like a seventy-two-hour shift. Well, it had been over fifty hours worked in a mere four days. Point being, yeah, I was tired.
When my husband (who didn’t work outside of the home) asked me to stop and pick him up something, I didn’t think the above for even a moment. It never entered my mind actually. He needed something, I had the only vehicle, and most importantly, I loved him.
You see, love is service. You serve in love and that’s the core of marriage. Here’s what marriage is not. It’s not comparison.
To say, “well, I’ve been working all day” is to suggest that he had not been working.
To say, “well, my job at the hospital is harder than his job at home” not only took away from the important tasks he performed in our home, but it also tried to value me over him. That’s not something we do.
 asked me to stop and pick him up something, I didn’t think the above for even a moment.){kind=link}