And with an eye-roll, my daughter turned away. She is two, and she can roll her eyes in a complete circle like a hamster wheel.
“You’re in trouble,” I have heard from bystanders, friends, and family. “I am in trouble,” I, myself, have even said on multiple occasions.
My eldest has a big personality, an extrovert who likes to challenge the status quo and try to get a rise out of me, her-mama-that-sometimes-wants-to-scream. And in some ways, I am in trouble. I know those teenage years are going to be interesting, but can I let you in on a little secret?
I will be happy to be in this kind of trouble. Teenagers being rebellious, not listening, breaking curfew, is so “teenage-like.” Yes, we will have consequences as parents, punishments for her actions — but doesn’t this all sound so refreshingly normal? To me, it sounds kind of blissful.
Let me explain. I was a goody-two-shoes that never thought about breaking a rule or rolling even one of my two eyes. And my point in bringing this up is I spent my teenage years completely wrapped up in my head — second guessing myself, people-pleasing, self-doubting, trying to be perfect — that I missed out on everything, even finding out who I was. I’d rather my teenager second guess me, roll her eyes at me, and be mad at me for not allowing her to hang out with her friends, then sit home and self-hate, and even worse do something about that self-hate (I had an eating disorder).
I have become more strong-willed as I have gotten older. I have recovered from eating disorders and have discovered who I am by gaining the confidence to explore my passions and the wherewithal to not care as much about what people think. But I missed out.
So, in my opinion, strong-willed is an extremely good quality to have from the get-go. Yes, it’s tough to parent, but it’s highly necessary in this hard world.
Strong-willed means I won’t have to worry as much about my daughter people-pleasing and bending into the pressures of others. Being a parent of a strong-willed child, you know that your child won’t give in to the demands of others. I mean, my child hardly ever listens to me until at least the fifth try, if at all, so I think she will be pretty keen on the whole concept of only doing what makes her comfortable.
So, I want her to continue to roll her eyes.
Strong-willed means she will persevere no matter who tells her she can’t. She will do what she puts her mind to, and no one will deter her goals.