But the truth is that I always felt out of place. I felt too messy and big and awkward and ugly.
And that’s half the reason why my bible is all messy and unusual and what many people call vandalism. But the truth is that it’s a sanctuary for me. A place where I can drop the filters and be the sad little girl that hid in a bathroom stall. Except there’s no hiding behind baggy sweatshirts, no comparison, no judgment, no holding back. It’s me, my heart poured out in every color, scratch, and squiggle. There’s kind of system to it, sometimes, but not really. & that’s okay.
Because at 20, I had found confidence in one place alone – at Jesus’ feet. And today, it’s still the only place I’m free drop the filters, to feel imperfect and ugly without wanting to hide, and free to be messy with a God who adores every ounce of me. That is radical. And my outpour on the page is my response.
It’s true for you, too. So if you’re feeling fat or ugly or heartbroken or discouraged or any form of messy: that’s okay. You weren’t made to be like the right page. You were made to be like the left: bold, bright, beautiful, and maybe a little messy.
Because messy in the Word = confident in the world.”
In a world where it’s easy to feel like a misunderstood square peg in a round role, remember God’s not in the business of creating cookie-cutter Christians.
He’s out to pursue the unique, crazy, awkward, whip-your-hair-back-and-forth weirdo that makes you YOU—and your big, fat, messy, not-so #InstaPerfect life may just be exactly what he’s using to craft His perfect love story.
