Bear with me, I’m almost done. But I need to talk about God for a minute, and how I failed him. How I lost my way from him through our journey. And how I found my way back. Every time I walked past the baby aisle or saw another pregnancy announcement on Facebook. Every time I saw some pregnant woman smoking a cigarette, or heard about another baby being born drug addicted… I questioned how in the world he could be giving all of these women these babies and they can’t even take care of them? We can… It’s not fair, why would he give me this longing to be a mother if he wasn’t going to allow me to be a mother but friends, he knew what he was doing! The whole time, I just didn’t see it.
‘He gives the childless woman a family, making her a happy Mother. Praise the Lord.’ Psalms 113:9
I stumbled across this saying and it hit me like a semi-truck. ‘We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.’ all along God was trying to give us signs. We just ignored them. He chose us, he set us aside to be parents. He gave us this longing and this love so we could love his children. The motherless child.
We have decided that we are done trying to have a biological child. We don’t need our child to biologically ours to love and cherish them. We are not going to pursue IVF. God has given us a child to be ours forever. And we will love and cherish this sweet boy for the rest of our lives.
And if you are 1/8 struggling with Infertility and reading this, you are not alone. And there is light at the end of the tunnel! It may not be the path you’ve chosen for yourself, but God will show you a path to parenthood!”
**This story was written by Kyla Throckmorton. Used with permission. See more from Kyla on her Instagram page.
