Whether you’ve been through it or not, it’s no secret that divorce wreaks havoc on anybody it touches. Often those who suffer most are the ones who deserve it the least: the children. So, what does getting gifts for ex-wife have to do with it? Enter Billy Flynn with the answer.
Gifts for ex-wife and other counter-cultural approaches to relationships
Most divorces don’t necessarily involve a peaceful, amicable split, so it’s easy to see why the temptation would be to treat your ex like dirt, or at least largely stay out of his/her life. That’s precisely why one man, Billy Flynn, was under quite a bit of scrutiny from his friends for doing nice things for his ex-wife. Rather irritated by people constantly asking why he did it, Billy wrote a brutally honest Facebook post that has been shared all over the Internet. Read it in full below (edited for language):
“It’s my ex-wife’s birthday today so I got up early and brought flowers and cards and a gift over for the kids to give her and helped them make her breakfast. Per usual someone asked me [why] I still do things for her all the time. This annoys me. So ima break it down for you all.
I’m raising two little men. The example I set for how I treat their mom is going to significantly shape how they see and treat women and affect their perception of relationships. I think even more so in my case because we are divorced. So if you aren’t modeling good relationship behavior for your kids, get your [act] together. I don’t care if she’s a [jerk]. Rise above it and be an example. This is bigger than you.
Raise good men. Raise strong women. Please. The world needs them, now more than ever.”
Billy’s wise words of parental and relationship wisdom have been shared nearly 115,000 times—but he admits, this wasn’t always easy for him to do.
“It definitely wasn’t easy upfront. I’d say it took us a good year to get it right,” he told IJ Review.
“Divorce is hard and I think we all do and say some things that really aren’t our best selves. But we always put the kids first, and honestly, I think that focus helped us repair our relationship into one of mutual respect over time, and our kids win as a result.”