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How to Overcome Comparison: An Open Letter From a Recovering Perfectionist

We’ve made real out to mean just the bare face and only the hard and ugly stuff because deep down, we have a hard time accepting others’ joy and happiness and beauty. We let others’ joy and beauty make us feel less happy or beautiful. But we don’t have to let it. It doesn’t impose itself on us, we welcome it in far too often.

We’ve become a world that tries to compare both our broken and our beauty and then complain as if comparison attacked us or something. But real is ALSO laughter and love and sunshine and beautiful things, too.

What if we just celebrated the moments as they are–instead of making them look super put together or proving that they’re totally not put together?

We don’t need to shame our sister’s beauty but we also don’t need to shame ourselves when we don’t feel so beautiful.

You’re not a victim of perfectionism or comparison and you don’t have anything to prove.

Because REAL isn’t just a make up-less photo and inspiring caption. Real is genuine conversation, a listening ear, an honest heart, and a cheerful song. Real is spending time with people. Then, focusing on them. Not spending time looking at people on the internet. Real runs deeper than any image you will ever see on the internet.
REAL lives IN you, not on you, because real is GOD. Real in it’s rarest form is beautiful and darling, so are you.

So, here are three practical steps you can take to put this to rest TODAY:

1. Get off the internet and be real by living real life–call someone or hug someone.

2. Send the person you compare yourself to most an encouraging message or admit to them you compare yourself to them and have a discussion about it (my friends and I have done this at times and it’s SO freeing!)

3. Identify if you are channeling your own negative energy toward someone else simply because they seem better off than you. Then, make a choice. CHOOSE to turn to the Lord and refocus on what matters most. Call that out for what it is and rechannel that energy into something life giving…do something to help someone in need, call your mom, or say the prayer below.

“Father God, I feel the pressure to prove something right now. I feel like I don’t measure up to everyone else.  I feel the nasty feelings of comparison creeping up. But I KNOW that Jesus already proved all that there is to prove on the cross. I KNOW you made me unique and real and full of life—just as I am. I KNOW that the very breath in my lungs is a sign of you living in me. When I compare myself to others, I’m making other’s the standard to live up to when in reality, I know you are the only standard. I invite you to take your rightful place on the throne of my heart. I trust that you are real and good and faithful. I trust that you work out all things for the good of those who love You. So, today, I choose You. I choose Truth over feelings and real over pretending to be real. I choose to live the life you’ve designed for me instead of longing for the life you designed for someone else. Fill me with Your Spirit and help me march on in what really matters. Amen.”

VERSES TO MEMORIZE:

Galatians 6:4-5 “Each one of you must examine your own actions. Then you can be proud of your own accomplishments without comparing yourself to others.”

1 Timothy 6:6 “Godliness with contentment is great gain.”

2 Corinthians 10:17 “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”

Jordan Lee
Jordan Leehttp://thesoulscripts.com/
Jordan Lee is the creative voice behind the blog, The SoulScripts. She is passionate about seeing women set free by the love of Christ and works to bring them to that through sharing real, raw, and relatable stories and anecdotes with a creative spin. She launched her site in 2015 on a simple premise — to get real, to sort through the lies women believe, and to encourage readers in Truth while offering touches of comic relief along the way. She especially loves to keep it real by speaking openly into real-life struggles and offer encouragement through storytelling because she believes that our stories are the most unifying thing we have. The messy, broken, and imperfect parts of life are the threads that weave us together, reminding us that we are truly not alone. She understands the reality that we all have imperfections, brokenness, and pieces of our lives we’d rather not show. She recently published her first book, WholeheARTed: A Coloring Book Devotional, released this past spring. It is available for purchase via Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Lifeway, and more. When she isn’t writing, you can find her with a coffee in hand as she dives into the Word, jogging through town, and traveling the globe with her husband. You can get to know her more on Facebook, Twitter,or Instagram.

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