Depression does not discriminate _ from the oldest to youngest, richest to poorest, most glamorous lives to those who live in constant struggle, yet it is so taboo to speak of.
Perhaps the most common group of people to sweep this under the rug and put everyone else’s needs and feelings first is mothers.
I remember vividly how exposed I felt when I finally admitted to the world — [OK] to my blog who ARE all the people in my world, that I am bipolar.
I admitted it haltingly, concerned of who would look at me differently.
I shyly told my story in a blog that now has the most views and comments of anything I’ve ever written.
Why? Because it’s real and people can relate. Perhaps you’ve heard the saying that sharing your story may be the key that unlocks someone else’s prison.
When someone says the words out loud, it makes you feel like you can talk about it too. You know you can have a conversation and not be judged.
I have struggled with depression since I was a young child and it finally took over when I attempted suicide when I was 15 years old. I have been to more therapists and psychiatrists then I can count in the last 20 years and it has become a part of who I am.
Some days are worse than others. Some seasons of life, it hangs around closer than I wish it would. Sometimes it ruins my entire day because I have several panic attacks a day or spend too much time overthinking something.
Some days I can be more the mom I wish to be and some days, we just survive and that is [OK].
It is so strange to me that depression or anxiety is viewed by anyone as a weakness, because often it is just an emotional response to the build-up of handling so much stress, juggling too many balls in the air and being stronger than anyone should have to be, for too long.
In fact, in my experience some of the most respected community members — The PTA Mom, The Pastor’s wife, The Pinterest Mom — they are the ones who are silently battling depression.
Perhaps it’s because we fear that our reputations as “Super Moms” would be tarnished if anyone really knew our struggles.